It all started with a conversation that I had with my mom on Tuesday evening.
She had called just to checkup on me, not knowing that I had gotten sick and had almost completely lost my ability to speak. So she was a little alarmed when she heard the weak and barely audible sound of my voice. I heard the 'mom tone' in her voice almost instantly as she had me explain to her all that had happened since Sunday night. But then she asked me a question that I was not expecting, "Have you thought anymore about what I asked you after your heart attack?"
I knew exactly what she was referring to, because I had thought about it several times over the past two months. Just a few days after the heart attack my mom had sent me a text, "Damien; have you ever considered that the enemy of your soul was trying to kill you, but God would not allow it?"
Mom has always been sensitive to spiritual warfare, so when she makes a statement like this it is probably something worth taking the time to consider. I had been considering this question. Because I had been wrestling with a conversation that I had just had about three weeks ago after church with my friend Sandra and her husband Dean.
Norma and I were checking out their new Harley Davidson motorcycles and we started talking about the days when I used to ride a motorcycle. Now whenever the topic of me and motorcycles come up, the story of my accident always ends up being told. And let's face it, getting thrown off a motorcycle at 100 miles/hr and bouncing down the highway the length of a football field ain't nothing to sneeze at. But in the eighteen years that have past since that day, I have come to realize, that part of the story was not the miracle.
It was three days before our third-year wedding anniversary, and the last thing that I had said to Norma before I left on that trip was, "Pack your stuff while I am gone and get out my house. I am divorcing you when I come back."
Now as Norma was telling Sandra about this she started to laugh; because she just loves to throw in the part that even though I had only ever done it this one time in my life, that weekend I had went to the strip club. She told Sandra that the accident was God's punishment for the way I had treated her and that it was His will for us to stay together. Now, for a lot of years I used to believe the same thing. But I have come to realize that this is a very religious way of thinking. God is my Father, and no good father would throw his son off a motorcycle at 100 miles/hr. as a punishment. There had been several warnings not to go on that trip, Norma had begged me not to go; but what I had not seen was the danger that was waiting for me.
I had already walked away from God's will for my life; but when I walked away from Norma that day, I also walked away from the protection that comes from being in covenant relationship. I headed down the highway in a very vulnerable state and the enemy of my soul took his best shot. It was only by God's intervention that I survived that fall, because it was meant to kill me. As I shared this Sandra's (aka Pastor Moses) hand went up and she said, "I am hearing the Holy Spirit right now, this is the story that you need to tell; this is your testimony!"
As Mom and I were talking about this I heard the Lord say that it was a "Course Correction" in my life. I was a different person eighteen years ago, but that accident changed the course of my life. I didn't have the answer yet but somehow I knew that this heart attack was going to be another changing point in my life. Mom asked what I meant by that, and I told her that I didn't quite understand it all yet. Back then, everything changed. We had a son, our marriage was restored (with a lot of work) I returned to my walk with God. Within a few short years there was almost nothing that resembled my previous life.
But I am in a different place now. I have actually been very encouraged with where life seemed to be heading the past couple years. Norma and I have a great relationship, with each other and with God. I have three wonderful kids that I love dearly. Our home is blessed and we have been blessed to have a church home that is equally as wonderful. We have even begun to see dreams coming back to life that we had given up on years ago. In all, my life is in a good place; so I really wasn't sure where the heart attack was coming from. I told Mom that I was still praying about it and that God would answer me in His time. I just knew that even though the situations were not the same, the results would be similar. Very soon, my life was about to enter a new season, and somehow this was the starting point. We left the conversation at that, I said, "I love you and I will keep you posted".
Later that evening I told Norma about my conversation with mom, she was interested but didn't know anymore than I did about where this might go next. What she did say was, "Pastor Vanessa told me today that you should go to the staff prayer meeting tomorrow morning. Maybe God will give you an answer there tomorrow?" So I went to bed a little perplexed and a little excited, because this has been on my mind for a few weeks now. What I didn't know yet was that I wasn't going to have to wait until morning for an answer.
It was the first night that I had slept well since getting sick, and it was a good sleep. But at 3am I woke up, rested and wide awake. I have woke up at 3am more times than I count over the years knowing that I was being called upon to pray. I don't always know why or what exactly it is that I am to pray about, but I have learned that it is important that I do so none the less (it's an intercessor thing). But this was different; I asked the Lord what did He want me to pray about ? He told me, no praying, we're just going to talk and I want you to listen. The conversation went something like this:
Do you remember, what was the first thing that I commanded Joshua to do after he crossed the river and led the people into the promised land? You have studied this before and it always seemed unusual to you that I waited until after my children entered the promised land that I would have Joshua circumcise all the men. In essence leaving them hurting and unable to fight on enemy ground, why not do it before they crossed over?
I was going to get up and get my Bible to start reading Joshua but the Lord told me to wait till morning, we were just talking right now and I could read once I had finished resting. Then He told me that there was something else that I should take some time to look at:
When the river was stopped so that my children could cross on dry ground, the waters backed up and destroyed a city upstream, there is something important that I want you to understand about this. Most people think that Jericho was the first city that was conquered when Israel started to take the land that I had promised to them. But I took the first city before they even crossed over.
We talked for a bit longer, like I would with one of my sons. At this point I was ready to get up and start studying, but I heard God clearly tell me to go back to sleep and get a full nights rest. I could read once I got up and it would all start to make sense as I searched it out.
The first thing that I learned as I started to read the book of Joshua was that the city was named Adam, for some reason I had thought that it was the city of Dan, which had caused me to have already made some assumptions of what I thought that I would find. But the name Adam spoke something much different to me. To bring His children into the promised land, God would first wash away the city of Adam. I decided to do a little more research on the city of Adam and learned something interesting, the city of Adam had a bridge. In military strategy it is always preferred to conquer the city and take possession of the bridge, rather than find another way across or build a bridge of your own. It was also the ancient name of the city's bridge that caught my attention:
But what did this mean? It wasn't until I started to look into why the Lord had Joshua circumcise the men after they crossed over that I began to understand what the Lord was trying to show me.
Too often we try to approach destiny in the same way that we would plan a career. We plan, we prepare, we network, we build bridges where we think that they would be most beneficial in order to help us reach our goals as we try to figure out how to claim our promised land. But the Glory of Destiny is in the hands of the Living God. It is when God makes a way where there is no way at all that we see His hand at work. I have followed the Lord and I have seen the beginning of some pretty exciting things recently, but at the same time I have been trying to figure out what my next step might be. I have been looking for a way that makes sense.
Upon this realization I heard the Lord speak to my spirit one more time: In the motorcycle accident I allowed you to experience a Course Correction, but through the heart attack you will soon experience a Course Connection.
I understood that I have been on the right path, but to continue on this path I would have to cut away the flesh. We can't force destiny, we can only be faithful to wait on God's timing. It is not something that we can accomplish in our own strength. Damien would always try to find a bridge, a Damieh, to reach the other side.
But I have also been given another name, It is another story for another time but several years ago in a mighty move of the prophetic, I was told that my new name was Joshua. And it will be in the spirit of Joshua, after this 'Course Connection' that God will lead me into what He has planned next for my life. It will not be by my strength or any plan that I could conceive that God will lead me into what He has planned next. Now I will admit that some of this might be open to interpretation, and you could say that this all sounds great but how can you be sure that this isn't just me telling myself what I want to hear. I might have told myself the same thing, but then I went to the morning prayer meeting.
And what happened next, Oh boy.
It was a good prayer meeting, but nothing to out of the ordinary had happened, yet. As we were closing out the meeting, we were asked to place our hands on three young men who were about to leave town in order to follow the Lord's call on their lives and pray for them. Pastor Mike would be one of the men going to New York City this week to work on the upcoming launch of his new church plant, V1 Church. After we had prayed for them, I felt like it was important for me to share with him what the Lord had showed me that morning.
I cautiously approached Pastor Mike and said, "I hope that this doesn't sound crazy, but I think that I am supposed to share this with you." I told Him about what the Lord had shared with me. I told him that Jericho was not the first city that God had given to His children in victory, because He gone gone before them. Before they had even realized that the city needed to be destroyed, God had removed the bridge of Adam. I really didn't know what he would think of all of this, or if it would make any sense to him at all; but as I watched him fighting back the tears, I knew that the Lord had orchestrated this moment. Pastor Mike told me this, "Listen to how crazy this is. When my wife Julie went to make my hotel reservations, she could only find one hotel to get me into and it is in the town of Jericho. I told the Lord that I knew there must be some significance to that name. Because what are the odds of only finding a vacancy in one hotel in a town named Jericho, but I didn't know what it meant until you shared this with me. and now the Lord has given me confirmation and understanding!" All I can say is that we were both a little bit blown away at what God had done for us that morning. And just to round the story out, to show how
God had tied all of this together; Pastor Mike is Sandra's (aka Pastor Moses) son.
I don't know exactly what God has in store for my life next, but I believe that it will happen in a way that only He will be able to receive the glory. And I also believe that I will not be the only one, there is a new season that has already begun and we will soon begin to see the first fruits of this season. Many people think that you have to give up too much to follow the path that God sets in front of you. But I like how my pastor, Pastor Dave, says it, "God is not trying to get something FROM you, He is trying to get something TO you."
This is a life of excitement, that goes beyond explanation; I hope that everyone who reads this will find this life for themselves. If you have not met Jesus, let me introduce you to Him. The Devil will tell you that Jesus will only CORRECT you, that you will miss out on all the fun. But it is Jesus that will CONNECT you to your extraordinary destiny, in Jesus, Life is Here!
She had called just to checkup on me, not knowing that I had gotten sick and had almost completely lost my ability to speak. So she was a little alarmed when she heard the weak and barely audible sound of my voice. I heard the 'mom tone' in her voice almost instantly as she had me explain to her all that had happened since Sunday night. But then she asked me a question that I was not expecting, "Have you thought anymore about what I asked you after your heart attack?"
I knew exactly what she was referring to, because I had thought about it several times over the past two months. Just a few days after the heart attack my mom had sent me a text, "Damien; have you ever considered that the enemy of your soul was trying to kill you, but God would not allow it?"
Mom has always been sensitive to spiritual warfare, so when she makes a statement like this it is probably something worth taking the time to consider. I had been considering this question. Because I had been wrestling with a conversation that I had just had about three weeks ago after church with my friend Sandra and her husband Dean.
Norma and I were checking out their new Harley Davidson motorcycles and we started talking about the days when I used to ride a motorcycle. Now whenever the topic of me and motorcycles come up, the story of my accident always ends up being told. And let's face it, getting thrown off a motorcycle at 100 miles/hr and bouncing down the highway the length of a football field ain't nothing to sneeze at. But in the eighteen years that have past since that day, I have come to realize, that part of the story was not the miracle.
It was three days before our third-year wedding anniversary, and the last thing that I had said to Norma before I left on that trip was, "Pack your stuff while I am gone and get out my house. I am divorcing you when I come back."
Now as Norma was telling Sandra about this she started to laugh; because she just loves to throw in the part that even though I had only ever done it this one time in my life, that weekend I had went to the strip club. She told Sandra that the accident was God's punishment for the way I had treated her and that it was His will for us to stay together. Now, for a lot of years I used to believe the same thing. But I have come to realize that this is a very religious way of thinking. God is my Father, and no good father would throw his son off a motorcycle at 100 miles/hr. as a punishment. There had been several warnings not to go on that trip, Norma had begged me not to go; but what I had not seen was the danger that was waiting for me.
I had already walked away from God's will for my life; but when I walked away from Norma that day, I also walked away from the protection that comes from being in covenant relationship. I headed down the highway in a very vulnerable state and the enemy of my soul took his best shot. It was only by God's intervention that I survived that fall, because it was meant to kill me. As I shared this Sandra's (aka Pastor Moses) hand went up and she said, "I am hearing the Holy Spirit right now, this is the story that you need to tell; this is your testimony!"
As Mom and I were talking about this I heard the Lord say that it was a "Course Correction" in my life. I was a different person eighteen years ago, but that accident changed the course of my life. I didn't have the answer yet but somehow I knew that this heart attack was going to be another changing point in my life. Mom asked what I meant by that, and I told her that I didn't quite understand it all yet. Back then, everything changed. We had a son, our marriage was restored (with a lot of work) I returned to my walk with God. Within a few short years there was almost nothing that resembled my previous life.
But I am in a different place now. I have actually been very encouraged with where life seemed to be heading the past couple years. Norma and I have a great relationship, with each other and with God. I have three wonderful kids that I love dearly. Our home is blessed and we have been blessed to have a church home that is equally as wonderful. We have even begun to see dreams coming back to life that we had given up on years ago. In all, my life is in a good place; so I really wasn't sure where the heart attack was coming from. I told Mom that I was still praying about it and that God would answer me in His time. I just knew that even though the situations were not the same, the results would be similar. Very soon, my life was about to enter a new season, and somehow this was the starting point. We left the conversation at that, I said, "I love you and I will keep you posted".
Later that evening I told Norma about my conversation with mom, she was interested but didn't know anymore than I did about where this might go next. What she did say was, "Pastor Vanessa told me today that you should go to the staff prayer meeting tomorrow morning. Maybe God will give you an answer there tomorrow?" So I went to bed a little perplexed and a little excited, because this has been on my mind for a few weeks now. What I didn't know yet was that I wasn't going to have to wait until morning for an answer.
It was the first night that I had slept well since getting sick, and it was a good sleep. But at 3am I woke up, rested and wide awake. I have woke up at 3am more times than I count over the years knowing that I was being called upon to pray. I don't always know why or what exactly it is that I am to pray about, but I have learned that it is important that I do so none the less (it's an intercessor thing). But this was different; I asked the Lord what did He want me to pray about ? He told me, no praying, we're just going to talk and I want you to listen. The conversation went something like this:
Do you remember, what was the first thing that I commanded Joshua to do after he crossed the river and led the people into the promised land? You have studied this before and it always seemed unusual to you that I waited until after my children entered the promised land that I would have Joshua circumcise all the men. In essence leaving them hurting and unable to fight on enemy ground, why not do it before they crossed over?
I was going to get up and get my Bible to start reading Joshua but the Lord told me to wait till morning, we were just talking right now and I could read once I had finished resting. Then He told me that there was something else that I should take some time to look at:
When the river was stopped so that my children could cross on dry ground, the waters backed up and destroyed a city upstream, there is something important that I want you to understand about this. Most people think that Jericho was the first city that was conquered when Israel started to take the land that I had promised to them. But I took the first city before they even crossed over.
We talked for a bit longer, like I would with one of my sons. At this point I was ready to get up and start studying, but I heard God clearly tell me to go back to sleep and get a full nights rest. I could read once I got up and it would all start to make sense as I searched it out.
The first thing that I learned as I started to read the book of Joshua was that the city was named Adam, for some reason I had thought that it was the city of Dan, which had caused me to have already made some assumptions of what I thought that I would find. But the name Adam spoke something much different to me. To bring His children into the promised land, God would first wash away the city of Adam. I decided to do a little more research on the city of Adam and learned something interesting, the city of Adam had a bridge. In military strategy it is always preferred to conquer the city and take possession of the bridge, rather than find another way across or build a bridge of your own. It was also the ancient name of the city's bridge that caught my attention:
- Adam Bridge (Jisr ed Damieh) - named after the city of Adam, a Biblical mound near the bridge.
- Damiya, Damieh - the Arabic name of the bridge.
But what did this mean? It wasn't until I started to look into why the Lord had Joshua circumcise the men after they crossed over that I began to understand what the Lord was trying to show me.
Too often we try to approach destiny in the same way that we would plan a career. We plan, we prepare, we network, we build bridges where we think that they would be most beneficial in order to help us reach our goals as we try to figure out how to claim our promised land. But the Glory of Destiny is in the hands of the Living God. It is when God makes a way where there is no way at all that we see His hand at work. I have followed the Lord and I have seen the beginning of some pretty exciting things recently, but at the same time I have been trying to figure out what my next step might be. I have been looking for a way that makes sense.
Upon this realization I heard the Lord speak to my spirit one more time: In the motorcycle accident I allowed you to experience a Course Correction, but through the heart attack you will soon experience a Course Connection.
I understood that I have been on the right path, but to continue on this path I would have to cut away the flesh. We can't force destiny, we can only be faithful to wait on God's timing. It is not something that we can accomplish in our own strength. Damien would always try to find a bridge, a Damieh, to reach the other side.
But I have also been given another name, It is another story for another time but several years ago in a mighty move of the prophetic, I was told that my new name was Joshua. And it will be in the spirit of Joshua, after this 'Course Connection' that God will lead me into what He has planned next for my life. It will not be by my strength or any plan that I could conceive that God will lead me into what He has planned next. Now I will admit that some of this might be open to interpretation, and you could say that this all sounds great but how can you be sure that this isn't just me telling myself what I want to hear. I might have told myself the same thing, but then I went to the morning prayer meeting.
And what happened next, Oh boy.
It was a good prayer meeting, but nothing to out of the ordinary had happened, yet. As we were closing out the meeting, we were asked to place our hands on three young men who were about to leave town in order to follow the Lord's call on their lives and pray for them. Pastor Mike would be one of the men going to New York City this week to work on the upcoming launch of his new church plant, V1 Church. After we had prayed for them, I felt like it was important for me to share with him what the Lord had showed me that morning.
I cautiously approached Pastor Mike and said, "I hope that this doesn't sound crazy, but I think that I am supposed to share this with you." I told Him about what the Lord had shared with me. I told him that Jericho was not the first city that God had given to His children in victory, because He gone gone before them. Before they had even realized that the city needed to be destroyed, God had removed the bridge of Adam. I really didn't know what he would think of all of this, or if it would make any sense to him at all; but as I watched him fighting back the tears, I knew that the Lord had orchestrated this moment. Pastor Mike told me this, "Listen to how crazy this is. When my wife Julie went to make my hotel reservations, she could only find one hotel to get me into and it is in the town of Jericho. I told the Lord that I knew there must be some significance to that name. Because what are the odds of only finding a vacancy in one hotel in a town named Jericho, but I didn't know what it meant until you shared this with me. and now the Lord has given me confirmation and understanding!" All I can say is that we were both a little bit blown away at what God had done for us that morning. And just to round the story out, to show how
God had tied all of this together; Pastor Mike is Sandra's (aka Pastor Moses) son.
I don't know exactly what God has in store for my life next, but I believe that it will happen in a way that only He will be able to receive the glory. And I also believe that I will not be the only one, there is a new season that has already begun and we will soon begin to see the first fruits of this season. Many people think that you have to give up too much to follow the path that God sets in front of you. But I like how my pastor, Pastor Dave, says it, "God is not trying to get something FROM you, He is trying to get something TO you."
This is a life of excitement, that goes beyond explanation; I hope that everyone who reads this will find this life for themselves. If you have not met Jesus, let me introduce you to Him. The Devil will tell you that Jesus will only CORRECT you, that you will miss out on all the fun. But it is Jesus that will CONNECT you to your extraordinary destiny, in Jesus, Life is Here!
Ayyyyye! We talked about this at prayer! I knew you'd make it into a blog!
ReplyDeleteYeah, it was too hard not to.
DeleteAfter some of the things that have happened these past few weeks, I was getting a little down. It still amazes me how one conversation can change your entire perspective, I cherish moments like these.